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The Right People Will Love You More Through Your Imperfections

One of my all time favorite shows is Queen Sugar (so much so we have a surprise for you in our upcoming trauma & healing podcast series) which is currently streaming on Hulu. I'm watching it again for the 1,000th time and there is a scene that really caught my attention involving Ralph Angel and Darla after he discovers she was sexually assaulted years before.


The scene brilliantly shows the shame that Darla is carrying from being violated. She tells Ralph Angel that she wants him to look at her the way he looked at her before knowing about the assault. He tells her he can't, it's not possible, but that he loves her even more. And in the midst of this you can see her healing in real time.


Witnessing Ralph Angel reflect this to her touched me deeply. It displayed that real love will always deepen when our truths are exposed. 


The people who truly love us with love us more when we are wiling to vulnerably display our truths.


Not only will love set us free, but it will liberate us and those around us, while deepening our relationships in the process.


Exposing the darkest parts of ourselves can be scary.

Allowing people to see our quirks and what make us "weird" can feel like a pathway to rejection.

The thought of giving people access to our inner most thoughts can feel like a death wish (no pun intended).


This is why imposter syndrome is so real. It can take shape by illuminating the parts of ourselves that we deem as pleasing to others while hiding the parts that we feel will be rejected. Or it can be flat out exuding a lie to the world, as a means to be accepted.


The problem with faking or hiding is that from this place we can never attract deep authentic relationships because we are not being real. Being real, in part, causes us to expose our imperfections.


If you want to build the kind of community that is rooted in love in its purest form then you have to be willing to stand more succinctly in the fullness of who you are.


The right people will love you through your imperfections. 

The right people will see you clearly and accurately.

The right people will want to show up for you - whether you ask them to or not.

The right people will give you grace in the midst of your mistakes.


And for everyone else who rejects you simply for being that imperfect truth, f*ck em'. I mean try to love them in spite of how they reject you, see you less than who you are, or talk about you behind your back, but still f*ck em' because nobodies got time for that. 


The right people are waiting on you and your truth. As Brene' Brown said, stick your toe in the water to begin to reveal who are, and the right people will stick their toe in the water too. And in time as you do more and more of this you will get to beautiful depth as a result of both of your imperfections.

As you are working to cultivate more of your highest self which includes exposing the hidden parts of yourself, we've got you! Subscribe here to see all the support we have available to you over the next several months.

Let's get this pure love,

Demarra West


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