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The Beauty in Ritualizing Grief

Chasity, Sharnice, and I at Bold Restaurant

A couple days ago it was my fathers birthday and for the first time since he died nearly ten years ago my sisters and I gathered for dinner at one of our favorite restaurants.


The more we laughed, shared stories about our father, got each other caught up on each others lives, celebrated each others accomplishments, it felt like home.


Although we grew up in seemingly different worlds, and barely see each other, the blood lines that connect us, somehow keep us coming back to each other. And for that I'm truly grateful.


What could have been a day of mourning was a day filled with beauty. The three of us simply being together helped us honor our father in the way he would have wanted. Surrounded by the people he loved, with good food, and laughter.


My daughter and I also visited him at the graveyard because of how it feels to speak to him where he was put to rest.

We ate ice cream at Coldstone which is where we mainly gathered outside of each others homes.

And I read from the pages of Girl in Translation by Jean Kwok- the only physical belonging I have of his.


All to pay homage to him. To us.


If you haven't curated rituals to celebrate the people or things you lost, most dear to you, and in the way that feels most right, I implore you to do so.


Rituals help us stay connected to loss in a meaningful way. This allows you to memorialize the loss over and over and over again and not be bogged down with negative emotions in the process.


Whatever way you choose will bring you tremendous joy and peace in the midst of the gravity of such loss.


Honoring grief is so important to me that I created an entire chapter to it in Me Too: A Therapists Journey to Heal, Find, Liberation, & Joy. If you or someone you know is struggling with grief, that chapter alone will be worth the purchase. 


And of course I'm always here to walk along side you to support you in working through your grief. Just click here to schedule a complimentary consultation. 


We've also got tons of things coming up to support you in working through grief and beyond.

Let's get this joy-filled grief, 

Demarra West


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